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A blog for poetry, prose, and pop culture.

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Introspection

Hey all,

There has been a lot of drama going on in my family of late that really puts some of my life into proportion. A short time back I posted that my step mom Sherry had a stroke and I am glad to say she is doing better. She is really working hard at all of her therapy tasks, both physical and mental. I know that it had to be a huge strain on her, and my Dad, both financially and physically. I know that she has to be frustrated and angry, and tired. Especially doing things that I take for granted, smelling, tasting, walking, even typing and talking.

Now don't get me wrong, she has taken such huge steps on the road to her recovery already and I am really proud of her. One of the steps to her therapy is to type a story everyday, whether its real or fictional or whatever. By doing a blog she can improve many facets that she now has a tough time with. typing, reading, word recognition, and spelling are all helped, not to mention the practice in sentence structure and phonetics. She has been keeping a blog on her MySpace page, usually stories about her family or what her recovery's been like. Even current events. This past week she posted a story on my brother's impending visit to them in Ohio.

My brother hasn't been back in over 10 years, and has only seen my Dad one time since they moved for his wedding. He just had a baby and they were set to come out and visit before the stroke hit. So Gregg is taking his family back to Ohio. My Dad and Sherry are both very excited to get a look at my brother's first child. My Step mom posted a blog entry on this, talking about how happy Dad was to be seeing his first grandson.

Now this put Sherry's oldest son's wife into a tizzy because she thinks that the kid they had about 2 years ago is my Dad's first. Now on some levels they are completely right, though this is my Dad's first biological grandson. There is a special bond between Dad and my brother and I, and this being either o our first child, he has a special relationship with us. Family is always family, but the connection between my brother and my Dad and Sherry's kids are different. I don't think it was with any malicious intent that this message came out.

I don't want to be mean, but if heaven forbid something happened and there was a breakup somewhere, either by Sherry's oldest son Scott and Chrissy, or with my Dad and Sherry the dynamic changes for everyone. Of course there are different feelings involved but to play the shade of favoritism card is unfair, that is like asking Scott to care as much about me as he does about his other brothers Jeff or Randy whom he has known for his whole life. Truthfully he barely knows Gregg or myself. It doesn't mean anything negative, its just a different context.

Sherry and my Dad have done a lot to help out his family, financially and legally. Between the two of them they have six kids and I know that's rough. They accused Sherry of favoring the other kids over theirs as one of them had a birthday that they missed. Well Sherry was hospitalized with a stroke at the time! That seemed really fucking petty if you ask me. I know that the emotional strain that this has put on Sherry is hard, made worse by the trials she is having on the road to recovery.

I hope that she knows that she does have support of her family and that I don't think she shows favoritism. Sherry has been nothing but supportive to me and I hope she knows that she means a lot. If one person wants to be negative then let them and don't let it get you down.

I'm going to tell a story I've never told before.

I've met Chrissy one time in my life, on a visit back east Sherry, her youngest son Randy, and I drove to see them in Connecticut where Scott was stationed. My Dad couldn't go because of work so I drove the three of us with the intention of dropping them off for a visit and me heading into New York for the day as it was less than a 2 hour drive. Sherry stayed with her kids so all 3 of them could go with me down there and get a break from the kids.

Unfortunately the weekend we went it was also the same time that the Northeast was having flooding problems and it was raining fiercely. We parked outside of New York and took the subway in, part of the experience I wanted to have coming into Grand Central Station. Coming out of the subway the rain had really picked up. I managed to hail a cab and get a ride to the dock for the Statue of Liberty shuttle. It was closed due to the weather. After standing in the torrential downpour for about 45 minutes I managed to hail another cab for the 4 of us (they stayed under cover). I figured most of the attractions would be closed. I didn't want to pay to see The Empire State Building if we couldn't go out on the outlook and in this weather what fun would Central Park or the Central Park Zoo be. The same for Ground Zero and Times Square. I suggested going to the New York Metropolitan Museum of Art.

I love art and visiting the Met was in my top 5 list of things to do in New York. At this point I had paid for the parking, subway tickets, and both cab rides. Since the Met was my idea I paid for all of the passes to get in. I could have spent hours in there absorbing the culture and art, especially on the second floor admiring the famous paintings. To be honest Chrissy and Scott made the trip pretty miserable. They hated everything and tried to hurry me out of the Met. What were we going to do in this weather. I finally told them to do whatever they wanted and I'd meet them at the subway station to go home. They waited but I still felt rushed and guilty. They blew through the modern art section so fast. I don't think people have to like what I like, but I do think that if you would have rather done something else you had said so. Or at least be appreciative of what I had done. That trip to New York was so important to me, and it was miserable. The company could sure have helped.

Sherry, don't let it bother you. Some people won't be happy no matter what you do. Trust in those who love you unconditionally and everything will be fine. Keep to your blogs and keep practicing, I believe in you.

End of Line.
Gerrad!

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