As promised I wanted to put down my thoughts on my brothers wedding. Being asked to be the minister of the wedding at first seemed like a far fetched idea, mostly that my brother was just trying to save some scratch and not pay someone. The more I got into the idea the more I began to like the idea.
The wedding was a pretty simple affair, nothing overtly fancy or elaborate, just low key and relaxed. The ceremony itself only went about 15 minutes. I prepared a sermon written by myself, talking of the meaning of marriage and the symbolism of the wedding ring. I included a reading by an anonymous writer, as well as a second reading using a slightly re-written version of my poem, One Final Endeavor, rewording bits to be more marriage centric. Everybody says the sermon was great and very touching, though I doubly anyone would say that I sucked to my face, especially at the reception! My brother and his wife were happy though, and that is what mattered to me.
I did get a small burst of the giggles during the sermon, as the photographer knocked over a plaster vase during the reading of the vows, I had to stop for a minute and couldn't get going as the absurdity of the moment just compounded and I kept giggling. I did reign it in pretty quick but everybody kind of chuckled at the same time so I think I am okay.
It was a bit of a surprise to my new sister-in-law's parents that I was the minister. It seems no one ever told them that I was performing the ceremony and apparently they are a bit strict and don't approve of online ordination. I heard the tail end of the conversation and my brother defended me pretty fiercely, so I have to be glad he liked it. He did mention that they thought I did a good job, so I don't know.
My brother also diffused what could have been a volatile situation for me, his relationship with my Mom is pretty strained, there is a lot of bad blood in our past, and while I try to leave the past behind me, Gregg is still pretty raw, even after all these years. Mom and his wife, Tracy, don't get along either. She was upset with him for not really greeting her when she got to the ceremony (though I told her he was just busy with pre-wedding duties) and that she got cut out of Gregg's life story during the DJ's presentation of the events leading up to marriage. Gregg pulled her up after the father and daughter dance and said something to her. That gesture meant a lot to me, simply on the grounds that I am the one who has to deal with the fallout of any snubbing on his part. That saved me a ton of grief. I also thought it was really classy how they split up the father daughter dance. Tracy's sister never got that dance at her wedding, as her father originally disapproved of her choice in a spouse. So during the dance Tracy stepped aside and let her sister get her dance with her Dad. A really sweet moment.
There were some other good moments, seeing my Dad so happy and emotional was really special. Dad, Gregg and I have a very special close bond that I have a hard time explaining to others, we really came together during the divorce, and Dad was such a pillar of strength and support that I felt lucky to have him then. Dad must have been torn apart after the marriage, but he was always there, always supportive, he was our hero. Dad coming home was extra special.
I still can't wait until Gregg develops the instant camera pictures, as his best man, Joe, and I decorated his car. His wife is 6 weeks pregnant (I actually think its 8 by now...) so we put a bunch of condoms on the car with a gift tag that said better later than never. I also put astroglide all over his door handle. Classy I know.
I am really happy for my brother. Things are starting to shape up for him, and I couldn't be prouder of the kind of man he is turning into.
End of Line.